OWNING YOUR SHINE

Look at her, who does she think she is?"

"He's so full of himself. He's so big headed."

Have you ever heard these types of expressions being used? Have you said them yourself?

But what does being full of yourself actually mean? Seriously, what does it mean?

Is it being cocky or could it simply be having confidence in who you are? Is it being arrogant or might it just be saying no to playing small?

Plainly put, being full of yourself is to be brimming over with who you are. How utterly amazing is that? To be full of who you are. Not empty. Not lacking. Full.

Why do we believe that celebrating our greatness is something to be scorned?

We worry that if we let all of our colors blaze brightly, we'll be perceived as being "too much." We end up trying to throw shade on our most vibrant parts in order to blend in.

Are we supposed to walk some kind of middle line in life? Between shine and shame?

When we purposely set out to dilute who we are, we are denying ourselves our birthright to live in full bloom cum full expression.

When do we ever walk through a garden of gorgeous flowers and wish that they were less vibrant? Less alive? We don't. We marvel at their utter beauty and proud glory. We don't ask them to diminish their splendor. We simply ask them to be all that they are.

THE SPARKLE IS YOURS

If we place ourselves in the shadows then we not only prevent our true light from radiating out, but we're also left feeling envious of those that are basking in their own fabulous glow. 

I used to look longingly at other people who I'd see exuding sparkling confidence. I'd yearn to have their self-assuredness and be able to live out loud without apology. It wasn't until I stopped and had a rethought. And started surrounding myself with smart friends/people, I've always yearned to be better, and achieving that entails hanging with the right crowd - I am proud it turned out the way I envisioned, its one of the best decisions I ever made early in life.

YOUR GLOW STEMS FROM WITHIN

I remember that first time I presented a seminar in University (College), it was horrible, I didn't shine the way I planned, I felt miserable the entire week, I made up my mind never to cower or let fear win next time. The second time I did a seminar presentation, I was fully prepared, hyperactive and boisterous. I tried a trick I thought of, no one knew I had a pin in my left palm, and I did that to channel my fear, pain and attention than focusing on the crowd. It worked and I couldn't get down from the high and applause I got that day from my fellow scholars the entire semester. I bragged about it to my family and loved ones the whole year.

I said no to seeking approval. I said yes to being me. 

My life transformed when I stepped onto the stage of my own life, rather than hiding in the wings watching someone else's performance. Every step I've taken since has gifted me farther toward empowerment and farther away from self-doubt. I am so full of myself though I am still a work in progress - hopefully, I will get there soon. There's nothing wrong in being full of oneself, as long as you're not rubbing it on any body's face or demeaning people around you.

Do you secretly envy somebody else's life? Do you spend hours obsessing about how amazing they appear to be? What if you took some of that energy and invested it into your most precious stock? Yourself. 

One of the things I abhor in life is envying someone else's life.. Hell No!

Try this simple visualization exercise to get you back on point.

Imagine yourself sitting in front of a mirror illuminated with light bulbs, the ones you see in the dressing rooms that film stars use. Your reflection in the mirror radiates love, happiness, and confidence. The lights are bright and beautiful. So are you. So amazingly beautiful.

Remember this: every single time you waste energy wishing you had somebody else's life, a light in your own life goes out. One of those bulbs dies. Your reflection loses a little bit of its sparkle. Those bulbs need your life force to keep shining. Why are you illuminating someone else's reflection? Why are you giving your energy to their light bulbs?

Light up your life. This is the one time you don't need to be environmentally conscious! Burn those lights, baby! I'm talking fireworks bright. Because otherwise all those lights will lose their will to shine and you'll be fumbling around in the dark trying to find a torch. And that's not the look we're going for here.

So now you've got your own glow going, you need to keep the spark alive *wink emoji*

My name is Nnennaya Udeh, and I am unstoppable!